Just yesterday, myself, my roaming reporter, our new canine fact-finder and members of our family spent the day together. During this day, being yesterday, Jeff and his wife, Alicia, decided to make a vegetarian mushroom & nut paté.
Upon completion we realised the following:
a) needs way less nuts;
b) the recipe lists a serving size that is ludicrous (i.e. serves 4 – 6).
Our plan is as follows:
a) half the nuts.
b) write our own damn cookbook where when a recipe lists the possibility of serving 4 to 6 with a certain recipe, it also indicates 4 to 6 what.
Allow me to explain. This paté, as per above, fit an entire loaf pan with some to spare. There was, to put it mildly, a lot of the stuff. After initial joking has been completed: “Four to six? As a main? Who eats this much paté?”, Jeff mentioned that perhaps the cookbook meant that it would feed four to six famine-suffering hobos. They are usually a hungry bunch, and this made more sense. You can most likely imagine how this then went. You could have a risotto that serves 16 to 20 caterpillars. A pavolva that serves one donkey. We could even make up our own temperature scale—the reitasamgrade:
“Roast your bison for 20 minutes at -47 reitasamgrade, or until done.”
But wait (you say)! This has become vraiment compliqué! Not so. The DoL cookbook would not only include fun recipes for the busy person, but a comprehensive conversion chart so that in the event that you wanted to make the pavlova for the caterpillars instead of a donkey, you would know if you needed to double or half the recipe. *convenience*



